Your marriage is in trouble, and you know that even though you want to end it all, you still love your partner and will likely regret what you do soon. It's clear what you need to do: stop the divorce.
Divorce is not the answer, and rushing into one is a big mistake. The process of getting a divorce will make it impossible to rebuild your relationship, so you should think about it carefully and be sure you have tried everything to make your relationship better.
Your spouse doesn't understand you, and the two of you don't talk to each other anymore. It seems like there is a big gap between you, that even small things make you mad at each other, and that what used to be easy and fun has now become unbearable. To avoid divorce, you don't have to make concessions. Instead, you have to rediscover your relationship.
Relationships change so quickly that it seems almost impossible. People who were once passionate lovers who couldn't stand being apart become two different people who sometimes want to be as far away from each other as possible. The dangers of growing apart make them wonder about their relationship, and this often leads to a divorce.
Every person is different, and every couple has its own story, but the bottom line is usually this: one or both partners think it is impossible to turn the relationship into something that will thrive again. With the hope of regaining the love of the other lost, the partners turn to the simplest and what seems like the easiest solution. Instead of fighting and arguing over and over again, the clean cut divorce looks like a good solution.
Some couples find that divorce is the best way out of a hopeless situation, and sometimes this is probably the best way to go. But if you're one of the many people who still think there's a chance and want to keep building the relationship you have with your partner, who was once the person you were closest to, this is the place to start looking inward and outward and working to get your loving relationship back.
Good relationships start with good communication. You almost certainly have been in a relationship with good communication. Do you remember when you and your partner didn't have enough time to talk about your plans and share your thoughts? How much time has passed? How long has it been since you last talked to someone really well? Do you find yourself at a loss for words after you've talked about the kids' schedules, who has to drop off the dry cleaning, and when you'll see your in-laws?
You are not alone. Neither of you is doing anything wrong. You're probably just busy with your day-to-day life, and because your days are so busy, you've simply run out of time over the years to have fun conversations. And now you can't even remember how to talk to your partner. If you want to stop or avoid a divorce, you will need to change the way you talk to each other.
Good communication isn't that hard, and it's important if you want to stay together. Until you get used to it, it's just work. You will have to think a little harder and try a lot harder to avoid talking about the usual things. Talk about real things, not your job and what your kids are doing. If you think about things you want to talk about, you'll be eager to get home and tell your spouse about them. Avoid talking about things that your partner isn't interested in. Remember that this is about both of you and what you find interesting. Just finding this topic will earn you points for trying. Don't plan too much; just talk about things you haven't talked about in a while.
Listen to the news on your way to work or in the morning. When you listen, try to pay attention to the things you think your partner would like to hear. About what would she talk? Then, ask her if she heard the story and what she thought of it.
Talk about plans or things you want to do in the next month or two. Planning a trip together is a good topic, but only if you're both excited about going and if you're both involved in making plans.
Divorce can be hard to avoid, but it's not impossible. Now is the time to put time and effort into your marriage and do everything you can to keep from getting a divorce. Best of luck!.
