Taxes have to be paid, just like death. Tax season is just around the corner for most Americans. If only it were that easy to pay taxes.
You're going to need a good laugh when you start digging out those receipts, the eraser, and those plain English tax instructions that even Einstein couldn't figure out. Here you go:
- What makes a mosquito different from an IRS agent? One is a parasite that feeds on blood, and the other is an insect.
- It would be nice if we could all pay our taxes with a smile, but most of the time, we have to pay in cash.
- An income tax refund is the second most satisfying thing after being shot at and missing.
- Something that helps the other person is called a tax loophole. If it makes your life better, it is tax reform.
- There are two kinds of people who complain about taxes: men and women.
- We rarely use our ability to reason, except when we have to fill out a tax form.
- Like mothers, taxes are often misunderstood, but seldom forgotten.
- A man's tax return isn't the best way to figure out how honest he is. His bathroom scale needs to be set back to zero.
- I'm proud to live in the United States and pay taxes here. I could be just as proud for half as much money, though.
Mae West was right when she said that taxes are like sex. All tax cuts are good tax cuts; even bad tax cuts are good tax cuts,
If nothing else, it is good to know that a former President of the United States feels the same way about taxes as you do. If only someone would agree to a flat tax, millions of Americans could avoid the hassle and stress of filing taxes every year.
