How credit cards can be fun. Some funny jokes about balance transfers are much needed.
Credit cards with balance transfers can be many different things. On the surface, they work well as credit cards that let you put all your other credit card balances on one piece of plastic, but what else can they do? Not much research has been done on the subject, but I'm sure they can be used to cut down on crime. Please let me explain.
Let's say, for the sake of argument, that I had a lot of credit card debt. Like many other Americans, I got more credit cards to pay off the ones I already had. This put me in a bad circle. Since I had more than one card, I had to pay interest and late fees on each one, which made it impossible for me to ever pay them all off.
The stress and strain of always having to worry about money started to wear me down. I couldn't sleep some nights because I was worried and because I couldn't stop thinking of funny things to say to creditors who called me at all hours of the night to ask where the hell their money was. Oh, yeah, this is still just an idea. Really.
So, I finally lost it on a rainy Tuesday in the terrible month of March. It was funny how it went down. I was getting scared, probably because I wasn't getting enough sleep. I started to mix up the creditors with the upper management of my company. Those who wore suits that cost more than $300 were seen as suspicious. So, my boss asked me to come in for my annual review and to talk about how we could improve. As he talked about "trimming the fat" and "hunting down clients who haven't paid like the savages they are," I sat there with white knuckles and dripping sweat. I thought the hammer was going to drop, so I grabbed him by his trendy tie and comb-over, threw him into his charity golf event trophy case, and ran away.
When I realised I had hurt someone, I lost all self-control. I started robbing liquor stores and girl scouts on their cookie routes all over the country, again just in my head (I swear). I thought my nightmare would end if I could steal enough money to pay off my many credit cards. In a strange way, the worst nightmare was when I spent five nights in a Reno prison for robbing an old woman who turned out to be a 25-year-old cop who liked to cross-dress when he wasn't on duty.
How could I have stayed away from this completely false story that didn't happen two months ago? Well, I could not have been born a total nut, but there is another way. Let's say I moved all of the balances on my credit cards to a balance transfer card. My debt would have been easier to handle and pay off if there had been only one interest rate and (hopefully) none or only one set of late fees. If I hadn't done that, I might not have met Benny, who kept mistaking me for a woman named Rita because he thought I was a man.
Aside from telling you to avoid poorly dressed bag-ladies in Reno, the point I want to make is that balance transfer cards are a convenient way to solve a common problem. I know a lot of people who have gotten more than one credit card to pay off other credit cards. If you find yourself in a cycle like this, you might want to put all of your problems on one balance transfer card. Alternatively, you could do what I did. What I might have done. Yes, sure.
